November 2009

You are currently browsing the monthly archive for November 2009.

Romina and photographer, Mitch Mauricio in between takes.

Romina and photographer, Mitch Mauricio in between takes.

Bali, the “island of the gods”, an indulgent pleasurable place of realization and enlightenment.

To me, Bali will be all that and more. To me, Bali is my place of liberation and re-discovered passion.

Ever since I came back from the International Conference on AIDS in Asia and the Pacific (ICAAP9) held in Bali last August, my head has been bursting with ideas.

During that four day conference, in the company of like-minded individuals, I could think freely and openly question views on sexual health. In the confines of the prudish Catholic culture of my country, I often face censorship – mostly, my own (self-censorship is a fate worse than writer’s block, maybe even death, for some journalists). In order to be taken seriously as a sexual health advocate, I have to choose my words carefully so that the messages of safe sex will not be selectively interpreted as just “sex”. I imagine that it is a dilemma that most sexual health advocates face.

But at the ICAAP in Bali, we were all speaking the same language. We all shared the view that in our different roles – health care practitioner, government official, researcher, and activist, and yes, sex & relationship columnist – we could influence behavior, change perceptions about HIV/AIDS and bring about a positive change.

After Bali, I began to think of more creative ways to push the envelope when it came to communicating the importance safe sex and making it sexy. And that was the inception of a shoot that we called “Dare to Bare” where real everyday people came out and boldly showed their support for World AIDS Day by wearing the red HIV/AIDS ribbon and nothing but that. There were no models or celebrities, only people who were HIV/AIDS or reproductive health advocates and dared to share the details of their experience or encounter with the epidemic.

Read the rest of this entry »

Tags: , ,

If you don't love yourself how can you let other people love you ?We at The Pleasure Project would like to congratulate Extremadura region in Spain for a truly brilliant, rational and imminently sensible education programme to improve self pleasuring in the region. Masturbation is safe, makes you feel good – and lets you know what you like – also everyone does it or at last thinks about doing it. And yet it is conspicuously absent in any kind of sex education for young people. By not talking about wanking – we stop young people knowing about a great safer sex method. After all if you don’t love yourself how can you let other people love you ?

Tags: ,

robinpadilla_menshealthAnnie Philpott and I have what can probably be termed as “every safe sex activist’s ultimate fantasy”. This fantasy is of a hot, delectable specimen of a man subtlety promoting condoms, insinuating the pleasure that they bring.

During a conversation we had on this topic, the man who came to mind was George Clooney, Hollywood’s alpha-male and quintessential bachelor who has the distinction of being voted the sexiest man alive, more than once.

We imagined George looking his usual dapper self in a tux, pulling out what is distinctly a condom wrapper from his coat pocket. All the while, George would be looking into the camera with a knowing grin and a twinkle in his eye. There wouldn’t be a need for a lot of words – the power of the imagery would leave enough to the imagination.  In foreplay parlance, this kind of gaze could only signify “tantalizing anticipation”; a languorous scrumptious build-up to steamy action sure to ensue.
Wouldn’t this be just the thing that would make women tear their clothes off and jump into bed?

Read the rest of this entry »

Tags: , ,

lotion2Reporting live from the hallowed halls of the University of Oxford was never more exciting than last week, when Jerry Galea of the UCLA Programme in Global Health and the International Rectal Microbicide Advocates (IRMA) talked about the frontiers (or should that be ‘rear-iers’) of HIV prevention: the search for an effective rectal microbicide.

His visit was hosted by Oxford’s Centre for Evidence-Based Intervention (CEBI) in the Department of Social Policy and Social Work, and featured the facts about who’s having anal sex around the world (news flash: not just gay men), and the slippery subject of how to have your anal play and stay safe, too.

What are microbicides, and why would I put them up my *&%$?
Microbicides are a new type of product being developed which can be inserted into the vagina or rectum to reduce a person’s risk of HIV infection and possibly other sexually transmitted infections. Research to develop and test an effective vaginal microbicide has been ongoing for a number of years and, while there is no currently approved, effective product, there are a number of strong candidates. Yet research into rectal microbicides is in its infancy, despite the widespread practice of anal sex and the comparably high risk of transmission compared to most other forms of unprotected sex.

According to Galea, recent research shows that among heterosexuals in the UK the practice of anal intercourse is increasing. In the US 30–45% of heterosexual men and women reported experiencing anal sex, and the rate in Brazil was similar: around 40%. About 43% of female sex workers in South Africa report having engaged in anal intercourse.

If an effective vaginal microbicide is found, it will be crucially important to determine its effect on the anus because, explained Galea, before too long, someone will undoubtedly stick it up their arse. The vagina is relatively “durable” compared to the rectum – the latter being far more susceptible to irritation, tears and other damage – which is why unprotected anal intercourse poses a higher risk of HIV transmission than, for example, unprotected vaginal intercourse. Thus, finding and testing a rectal microbicide is a priority.

Enema anyone?
While there are many unanswered questions about rectal microbicides at this stage, one of the most interesting (at least for some of us) is about insertion and quantity. While we can simply lube up a penis or dildo with ordinary lubricant to make sex slippery (and reduce the chance of condom breakage or rectal damage), the same approach is unlikely to do the job when it comes to rectal microbicides. To be effective, microbicides may need to be applied in large quantities (a few tablespoons? a couple of cups? no one knows…). How’re we going to get all that up there and keep it there (enema anyone?)? And what happens when you stand up? (This fun Japanese ‘enema toilet’ may be the answer!)

Pleasure potential
This is a fascinating area of research and one that is long overdue for funding and support (both of which, unfortunately, are not sufficient at current levels). It’s also relevant from a pleasure perspective: if an effective rectal microbicide is developed, can it be marketed as a pleasure enhancement tool, rather than a clinical or pharmaceutical product? Will it be called ‘Recto-prevent’ … or Backdoor Butter? Will it be stigmatized, or celebrated as a way to have great sex while lowering the risk of infection?

Learn more and support the research and advocacy for rectal microbicides at the IRMA website.

Tags: ,

SexSmartFilms.comWhile I was in Mexico at the SSSS meeting, I went to a brilliant session by Mark Schoen of SexSmartFilms.com. Mark’s presentation, entitled “100 years of sex education films”, was enthralling enough to draw and keep awake an audience at 8am on a Sunday morning, the last day of the meeting – even though we were sitting in a darkened room. If that’s not impressive, I don’t know what is. Mark is himself a film maker, and has made it his mission to collect different films relating to sex. He’s always looking for more contributions, and would be especially interested in those relating to pleasure and sexuality. Here’s what he has to say:

SexSmartFilms.com is just as its name implies, instructional films about sex from around the world.  The collection is culturally and sexually diverse. It includes explicit and non-explicit, instructional and clinical, Public Service Announcements, documentaries and more. The library grows weekly and now has nearly 200 videos.   The oldest film is from 1896 – the first screen kiss, and the newest films are from 2009.  Many films are professionally produced and others come from student filmmakers.
Read the rest of this entry »

Tags:

Don't you just love a man who knows how to wear latex?

Don't you just love a man who knows how to wear latex?

When it comes to safe sex, I like to put my money where my mouth is.

Cabbages and Condoms in Bangkok is one restaurant that apparently likes to do the same.

I had read about Cabbages and Condoms and their innovative concept of a restaurant that promotes good food, safe sex and responsible family planning and just had to marvel at the balls behind the idea.

On my last trip to Bangkok, visiting the restaurant was one of the must-do’s on my list.

I was instantly entertained — tickled pink actually — by the rich imagery of this place that I can only describe as something like a condom Disneyland. Life-sized mannequins decked from head to toe in colorful condoms lined the entrance. There was a Condom Man in a superhero outfit made out of red and yellow condoms; a cool jock type with his equally cool gal pal dressed in pills and condoms. There was even a Santa Claus dressed in condoms with unfurled yellow rubbers for his beard which were also used for the evening gown of the lady standing beside him.

Read the rest of this entry »

Tags: , , ,

« Older entries